10 July 1996
James R. Trimble, a policeman in Urbandale, Iowa, was arrested last January after he was caught with a battery-operated "sexual device inserted into his body" while driving his car loaded with pornography, cocaine, LSD, marijuana, as well as some $20,000 worth of methamphetamine allegedly stolen from the police department's evidence.
Despite Officer Trimble's expertise in the field of criminal behavior, this was far from the perfect crime. Truth, justice and the American way prevailed, and Trimble was fired, sentenced to probation, and fined $1,000. In addition, he was ordered by the court to perform one hundred hours of community service: lecturing schoolchildren about the perils of illegal drugs.
It's a pity his audience will be limited to young students: I bet he has some first-hand accounts of drug abuse that would educate many an Iowa sophisticate.
©1996 David Glenn Rinehart