- 26 June 2007
- No. 7,166 (cartoon)
- This feels like a promising beginning.
No, its a happy ending.
- 27 June 2007
- Bernie and Dahlia
- Bernie said he was distraught to visit his old girlfriend Dahlia and discover that her face was desecrated.
You mean desiccated, no? I asked.
I meant what I said, Bernie replied. When we were lovers decades ago, she had the face of a goddess.
Thats time for you, I said.
In a rare moment of diplomacy, I didnt add that neither of us looked like teenagers anymore, either.
- 28 June 2007
- Brian Peter George St. John le Baptiste de la Salle Eno(ugh)
- Enrico asked me if I wanted to see Brian Enos 77 Million Paintings. I replied that I would, and added that Id like to make a copy of the program to run on my computer. And thats where the miscommunication began and ended.
No, I meant at a gallery, Enrico said. Tickets are twenty-five dollars.
Thats ridiculous, I replied. For fifty dollars we could buy a retail copy of his 77 Million Paintings program that generates the work and have enough left over for half a case of wine.
Enrico and I agreed to disagree.
Its not that I dont like Brian Peter George St. John le Baptiste de la Salle Enos work; I do. I saw him give a good talk a few years ago. For free, even. But thats a different kettle of kittens than paying to watch a computer program run unattended. Of course, no one will be paying to watch Enos work, theyll be paying to be in the same room as a celebrity.
I hope Enrico has a nice time. Assuming that I can find a bootleg copy on the Internet, I plan on seeing Enos work in my studio, without being surrounded by his sycophants. After all, intellectual groupies are still groupies.
- 29 June 2007
- Seven Frozen Meals Rich in Fat and Salt
- I didnt have any technical difficulties with this months piece, Seven Frozen Meals Rich in Fat and Salt. I made these photographs without a camera by simply putting the frozen meals on a flatbed scanner.
Still, the undertaking proved to be more difficult than I imagined. Well into the project, I decided I liked the look of products wrapped in cellophane. As a result, I decided not to use other images such as Homestyle Macaroni & Cheese (Fat: 10 grams, Salt: 730 milligrams). The concoctionfeaturing a frozen puddle of cheese-like substancewas based on a chef inspired recipe, as if that tenuous connection to real food might make it palatable. (It did not.)
I decided to stop after only seven images of cellophane-sealed products because I couldnt eat any more processed food. I originally planned on making many more than seven images, but found the alleged food too wretched, even for me.
- 30 June 2007
- Art and Suffering
- Do you suffer for your art? Abbie asked.
Only amateurs do that, I explained. My art suffers for me.
I was lying, of course; my arteries are still aching after eating Seven Frozen Meals Rich in Fat and Salt.
- 1 July 2007
- Its a Starsfish
- Byron, who just graduated from sixth grade, told me I shouldnt call a starfish a starfish because the beast really isnt a fish at all.
Then how should I address the pentagram-shaped marine thingie, I asked, as the unholy spawn of Satan and Poseidon?
Actually, Byron sniffed, the proper name these days is a sea star.
Thats fascinating, I replied.
Thats fascinating, seemed like a better reply for a precocious child than, Its a damned starfish, deal with it.
Im good with children, or so Ive been told.
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©2007 David Glenn Rinehart