- 20 November 2008
- No. 8,028 (cartoon)
- Are there questions that shouldnt be asked?
Are there questions that shouldnt be answered?
What in the hell are we talking about?!
- 21 November 2008
- Fast Fingernails and Slow Toenails
- I just read that fingernails grow faster than toenails. I should have observed and known about such an obvious phenomenon, but I didnt. Lifes full of things I should have noticed, but didnt.
- 22 November 2008
- Punk Bodyguards?!
- Punk musician Travis Barker filed a lawsuit for twenty-five thousand dollars after the jet he was on crashed and burned in South Carolina; the drummers bodyguard died.
Now wait just a cotton-pickin minute here! This sounds more than a little suspicious.
Since when did drummers become musicians? Since when did anyone file a lawsuit for only twenty-five thousand dollars? Thats just enough to cover the lawyers lunches. Since when did punk rock come to South Carolina? And since when did punk musicians or drummers have bodyguards?
Something smells rotten here; thats usually the case with drummers.
- 23 November 2008
- Half Bisexual
- Lina announced that shes half bisexual. In response, I gently told Lina that I prefer that my friends keep their private lives private. Lina replied that she was hopelessly heterosexual, and that she was just trying to be funny and clever.
I was tempted to tell her that people are funny and clever without trying or theyre not, but I kept my mouth shut. I should do that more often, but probably wont.
- 24 November 2008
- Duplicitous Sperm-Stealing Orchids
- Charles Darwin wrote The Origin of Species; everyone knows that. But I just heard aboutalmost a century and a half after the facthis next book, The Various Contrivances by Which Orchids Are Fertilized by Insects.
It seems that orchids fool male wasps into thinking theyre female wasps (?!) and pollinating them. I dont really understand how orchids have figured out that acquiring wasp sperm is in their best interests, which makes themnot to mention Darwinsmarter than me.
And speaking of stupid: I dont know much about male wasps either, but they must be either stupider and/or more desperate and/or drunker than their human counterparts to mistake an orchid for a member of their own species. Despite my myriad embarrassments and faux pas, Ive never mistaken any other species for a female human of the opposite sex.
- 25 November 2008
- Circular Logic
- I just discovered two new types of circles. First, theres a circle with a radius of zero; thats actually a point. At the other end of the circular spectrum, the radius of a circle with an infinite radius is, in fact, a line.
Of course, I really didnt discover this; smart mathematicians figured out this circular logic centuries ago. Still, Im happy with what I learned; from now on Ill never know whether the line Im looking at is a garden-variety line or part of an infinite circle.
- 26 November 2008
- Twenty-One Fort Mason, San Francisco, Parking Lines
- Write about what your everyday life offers you, Rainer Maria von Rilke advised. I generally ignore advice, especially when its from Rilkes book, Letters to a Young Poet. (As may be evident, Im neither young nor a poet.)
Nevertheless, photographing what my everyday life offers me has served me well. Recently, thats resulted in Two Sketched and Two Painted Arrows, and, most recently, Twenty-One Fort Mason, San Francisco, Parking Lines.
Despite the workers attempts to paint uniformly nondescript white lines in the repaved parking lot outside my window, each stripe is nevertheless different. I know this is a simplistic attitude, but this lack of visual conformity pleases me every time I walk through the parking spaces outside my studio.
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©2008 David Glenn Rinehart