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Weak XVII

24 April 2012

No. 7,757 (cartoon)

You had an abortion?

I wanted to spare it from life.

25 April 2012

Stephanie’s Quite Ridiculous Plan

Initially, I thought Stephanie’s plan to put hexagonal bamboo wheels on her bike was quite ridiculous. Later, after thinking about the some of the possibilities ... nope; still quite ridiculous.

26 April 2012

Squatting and Talking

More people in the world use mobile phones that safe sanitation. Or maybe more people have access to telephones than toilets. Something like that. In any case, that was the news I gleaned from a radio report from some miserable country I’ll never visit.

What I do remember is the reporter’s anecdote about a man squatting beside the road talking on his mobile phone. That’s a regrettably unforgettable image.

The story wasn’t really news. I know from spending time in unsavory neighborhoods and sleazy venues that the ratio of people would who prattle on incessantly to people who practice good hygiene is rather high.

27 April 2012

Gratuitous Photo of the Weak: Internet Archive Postcard

I’ve been meaning to make the postcard photograph of the Internet Archive’s headquarters for a long time, but never did because there were always cars parked in front of the entrance. I could always take the photo and surgically remove the cars with computer imaging software, but that’s too much like work. I knew my procrastination would be rewarded some day, and today is that day. I took advantage of a temporary parking ban to get the postcard image. It only took me a fifteenth of a hundredth of a second to create; who’d want to spend more time than that making a photograph?

28 April 2012

The Cat’s Out of the Tube

Sarah told me over lunch that she got real drunk at Deirdre’s party last night. She had a dreadful, protracted, and very public argument with Nancy’s boyfriend after they came out of the bathroom together. It sounded like one of those evenings, one of those parties.

“Nancy’s not speaking with me,” Sarah reported.

“I wouldn’t think that’s a problem,” I suggested.

Sarah smiled an enigmatic smile.

“Any regrets?” I asked.

“Regrets are useless,” she replied. “You can’t put the cat back in the tube.”

I’ve actually found regrets most useful in avoiding the repetition of lamentable behavior, but I didn’t tell Sarah that. I know she savors the cheap drama her minor scandals provide.

29 April 2012

Who Indeed

Brett’s supposed to be cleaning out the gutters on Rhonda’s house while she’s visiting her sister, and he claims he will. After another drink or two from Rhonda’s liquor cabinet.

“You’ve been saying that for quite a few drinks,” I cautioned. “Maybe you might want to do all the tasks that involve height and ladders before relubricating.”

“Nonsense,” he replied. “Any task you can’t accomplish while you’re inebriated is probably work, and who wants that?”

Who indeed.

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©2012 David Glenn Rinehart